Thursday, January 10, 2013

{ 39 weeks }

I had my 39 week appointment yesterday. Everything still looks fine; we're just waiting on baby, whenever baby decides it's time to arrive :] I think I'm past the impatient stage... I'm feeling okay right now... because I know it's in baby's best interest to come when he/she is ready to, and that "due dates" are total guesses with very little accuracy. I still wouldn't mind sooner rather than later, mostly just because of the pelvis/hip/back pain. The nausea comes and goes but hasn't been AS bad.

I haven't gone anywhere this week, except for my appointment, and don't really plan on going many (if any) places before baby is born. I kind of tend to "hibernate" at the end of my pregnancies. Getting out and about is a lot of work with a toddler (especially with such terrible pain!), and I just don't really have the energy for it right now... that, and part of me just feels sort of... anti-social, in a way... sometimes I can be pretty emotional and I know only certain people can handle my "grumpiness," so I usually just stick at home to rest and prepare.

I thought this was funny on "the"

The urge to nest. Don't stress though -- you'll never get everything done.

 Uuuum... actually, I think everything IS done... and has been done over and over again. Haha! There really isn't much "to do" to get ready for a baby... but some things are really nice to have organized and ready to go. I did some freezer cooking and have a nice little stock set up... I've also cleaned basically every corner of this house. I'm kind of getting a little bored :] Thankfully, Ryan is good at making a mess (as toddlers/boys should be), so I at least have something to clean and re-clean.

 Some of the "getting ready..."

 [Ryan's closet with baby's dresser inside]

 [where baby will sleep when he/she isn't sleeping with us]

[the birth supplies!]

[more birth supplies; this is the "emergency basket" we'll grab in case the midwife doesn't make it on time. that won't happen though, right?!] 

Other than preparing myself mentally and getting my house ready, I've been trying to prepare spiritually for this new little one coming into the world. I am so blessed to have carried this child for this long. As I hear stories of women losing their newly discovered babies, or babies just being ready to be born, my heart aches with how much I've wanted this one OUT! God knows the exact time that he/she will be born, and it will be perfect... I don't need to be anxious about it. I should be thankful for every single minute I'm a mama to this little one and not be desperate for the next moment.

I get a little emotional every time I put Ryan to bed. "Is this the last time I'll rock him before sleep as my 'only' child?" I don't doubt that I will love this new baby very much (I already do!), but change is hard... even when it's GOOD and exciting change. Ryan is SO much fun and such a blessing to us... it's sometimes difficult to imagine how life is going to change. It will be hard. But it will be beautiful, as long as Christ is the focus of our family. We are so blessed! 

I would love your prayers as this pregnancy journey ends... whenever that will be... that the labor and delivery go smoothly, and that baby will be born healthy!! 

And now, I shall continue my hibernation. :] 


Carrie Martin-Vegue said...

Praying for you these last days. (I love that website you linked to at the beginning of your post. :-))

StandingOnTruth said...

Have been praying and will continue to pray daily for you! SO excited for you and to anxious to meet Baby Hawkins too!! You are doing great! Love you!

Cassie Deputie said...

SO SO SO SO SO Excited for you!
Can't wait to hear how the home birth went!!
You Go Girl!